George's mom was known for being a little long-winded, but despite receiving a little too much insight into her personal life, George was satisfied with the outcome of the conversation. Feeling emboldened by the confirmation of his adage, George tackled the day's workload with an increased vigor.
George drove home excited to share the lyrical invention with his wife. When he walked in, she was preparing dinner.
Hey honey!
Hey, how was work?
It was good, listen to what I came up with today.
Ok.
Ok, first, ask me how I'm doing.
I already asked you that.
No, you asked me how work was.
That's basically the same thing, I think.
Not really, I could be doing great because I'm no longer at work where I had a terrible day.
I guess, but I think in general they're substitutable.
Either way, ask me how I'm doing.
Ok, but I just want to say, whatever you're about to say would have been more impactful if you just said it the first time I asked you.
Well, it's not really appropriate when you ask "how was work?"
Is it dirty?
No, not like that, it just doesn't work when you ask like that, just ask me how I'm doing.
How...
Pretend like we just woke up, or it's the first thing in the morning.
Ok...
No, ask me how I slept.
That's kind of a weird question, don't you think?
No, not really.
How often do people ask you how you slept? Is that a common question around you're office?
Forget it then, just ask me how I'm doing.
Ok, how are you doing?
Great, thanks for asking, I slept like a baby last night.
Ew. Why are you telling people how you slept? And how do you know what a baby sleeps like? Have you ever even been in the same house as a sleeping baby? It seems a little braggy to me, I don't think people really care how you slept.
It's not braggy. They're asking how I'm doing and I'm letting them know that I'm doing great because I slept so well.
Why don't you just say that then.
That's boring, there's no poetry to it.
Poetry? They're not asking William Blake how he's feeling.
Maybe like Blake, my genius won't be recognized until long after my own lifetime.
You're really reaching for the stars on this one huh?
I think it works, the philosophy is sound. My mom liked it.
Oh, you mean the woman that birthed the "sweetest baby ever who never cried no matter what?" Pretty surprised she agreed with you. My mom watches babies for a living, I grew up surrounded by babies all the time. Sleeping like a baby, sounds like a nightmare I would have.
That seems a little over the top.
Just last night as a matter of fact, I had a dream that I was stuck in a loop, it just kept playing over and over again, and I couldn't get out of it. In the loop I would fall asleep, and then wake up three hours later completely starving and I couldn't feed myself. I had to wait for someone else to feed me.
In this dream, did you shit yourself too?
As a matter of fact, yes, I did. Turns out I was dreaming that I was a baby.
I get it. Look, I'm willing to accept that my witticisms may not be recognized immediately, but know this: I slept like a baby will be commonplace in the next fifty years.
Just like happier than a tickled hyena right?
I don't see why not. Hyenas laugh a lot. I think it works.